Naughty Paris

Tuesday July 31 is our final day and night of shooting for the Naughty Paris Guide. Kirsten heads back to Toronto on Wednesday morning, so we have to make sure we get the must-have shots today.

We start off rather late, at 2pm, because we know we'll be up late shooting night-time images. The day begins at a beauty spa, the Boudoir du Marais. I've visited the place before and liked the decor, very pretty with exposed stone walls and elegant chandeliers and mirrors. However, when we arrive it seems like the place has been almost emptied out. "Are you getting ready to close up for the summer?" I ask. "No, we just moved in today. I bought the spa from the former owner."

Ah hah. She assures me that they will not change it at all. This is the most difficult aspect of writing any guidebook, the fact that places close, redecorate, or otherwise change completely between time of researching and the time of publication. I settle in for a manicure (I'm the hand model today, and dammit I need a manicure!) while Kirsten begins photographing the decor elements. The spa has a manicure "bar" and you can rent the whole place for private parties.

I'm more of a blood-red nail polish kind of girl, but my friends keep telling me that's not very "summer", so I go for the most obnoxious shade of bubble-gum pink. I can't help but think that I'm not tan enough (or blonde enough) to pull this off.

After my manicure, we go to lunch and the photographer has to return to her hotel to upload the photos so she has enough memory space to continue shooting (yes, this is all done with a digital SLR, so instead of carrying around rolls of film, she's carrying memory cards). We arrange to meet up with Stephen Clarke for a cameo shot.

Stephen reading a Parisian newspaper article about sexual habits of the French.

We are running a bit late for one of the most difficult shoots of the whole guide, Cris et Chuchotements, the last full-time fetish and s/m club in Paris. I was going to take the car, but 6pm traffic is looking bad so I think it will be easier to cross town on the metro. We happen to meet a fellow American, Byron, traveling around Paris with one of my guidebooks sticking out of his pocket (the Michelin Green Guide Paris). He's heading the same direction, so conveniently helps clear a path through the crowded metro so we could get out with all of the equipment in one piece. "We definitely need to hire a caddy/bodyguard/assistant next time we do this," says Kirsten. I wholeheartedly agree.

On the way to the club the photographer spots some oysters she wants to shoot in front of the Wepler Brasserie (Place de Clichy). I distract the oyster guy with questions about eating them during the months without "R" in them while Kirsten shoots away. So we're almost a half hour late for our fetish club appointment, not usually a problem in France, but a problem today. It's 7pm and the owner has to leave at 7:30pm, barely enough time for the model to change and for Kirsten to set up and adjust to the low lights.

My camera flash lights up the whole bar area, where Kirsten is quickly setting up.

We pick just two rooms to photograph, the bar area (which looks pretty harmless aside from a basket of riding crops next to the sofa and a pair of hand cuffs casually hanging from a hook) and one of the "play" rooms with a large bird cage and other light restraining devices. We do not shoot in the whipping room (the light wasn't good), nor the "medical exam" room (too creepy). I should mention the club is closed, so we are the only ones in there, bumbling around in the dark and trying not to trip over the various steps.

I was surprised this one came out so well: the model in her fetishwear dress and the photographer peeking out from under the spiral stairs.

After being shoo'd out of here rather quickly, we hop in a taxi and head to the Pont Neuf for some sunset shots with models Marcus and Eva, who are running about 15 minutes behind us. The two weeks of shooting, last-day exhaustion, and the endless rushing around finally break down our gentle Canadian photographer and she starts embracing her inner obnoxious photographer. She kicks a couple (politely) out of the little balcony we want to use (it's in the perfect place for the back ground and angle of the light) and quickly get the models in the right poses before we lose the light.

From Kirsten's point of view.

She's standing on the other side of the bridge, too far away for the models to hear her directions, so I'm standing next to them with a cell phone, repeating the orders that Kirsten is barking out. "Tell her to put her left leg up." "Tell him to pull her closer at the hips." "Stop posing, just act natural!" and finally, all decorum breaks down and I hear Kirsten yell, "Act like you want to f*** his brains out!"

(she tells me later she was aware of a few passers-by coming to a halt at that point)

I pause (probably blushing)....then I say, "Act like you really want to be in a room alone right now!" The models, bless them, finally get it and Kirsten gets her shot.


From my point of view on the bridge (it looks like Eva is biting his head off from this angle!)

The models don't actually know each other in "that way", but they fake it pretty well! I considered at one point just finding couples kissing on the bridge and asking their permission to shoot them for the guide, but there are so many factors to consider:

- will they be dressed right?
- will they keep doing the same thing over and over until we've got the perfect shot?
- will they let us make them stand in very unnatural poses which actually appear more natural on film?

There are so many things we can't control in the photo sessions, that we decide against this and go with our own models. We then make Eva and Marcus stand under the Pont Neuf (which is more typically sexy than romantic). We all have to breathe through our mouths because the stench of urine is a bit too strong (not very romantic, indeed). The next shot involved the woman straddling the man on a marble bench. Bless her (again) for trying so hard to pretend her knees weren't in excruciating pain while Kirsten kept promising "Almost done!"

And that was the last shoot with the models. We celebrated with dinner at l'Ecluse at St-Michel, then rushed back out at midnight to shoot one the Musée de l'Erotisme before it closed (at 2am). We detoured at the Eiffel Tower while Kirsten searched for the angle that the taxi took her past the night before, so we didn't arrive at Pigalle again until 1am. No one else was in the museum that night, so it was pretty easy to get in a few good shots without worrying about avoiding the public.

I perused the visitor's book at the museum, and found quite a few notes from women like this.

The famous "tongue chair" in the front window of the museum.

Pigalle at 2am is always lively (bus loads of Moulin Rouge clients, of course), but not necessarily the place you feel comfortable as a woman walking around with very expensive camera equipment. Luckily the peep show hawkers don't bother the women (they're looking to pull in the men walking around), so we quickly take a few pics of the neon windmill at the Moulin Rouge and then go back to the car.

We return to a more elegant district of Paris: the Place Vendôme, Champs-Elysées, Avenue Montaigne, etc., where the photographer gets some night shots of the facades.

This is the absolute very last and final photo shoot (I took this from the car as she set up her tripod on the square).

I sleep for two hours while the photographer packs up, then we drive to Ladurée for a final breakfast (and macarons!) before I drop her off at Charles de Gaulle airport at 9:30am.

That's all folks! For the rest of the month, while the rest of the country is on vacation, I will be finishing up the text editing while Kirsten processes the photographs and the designer creates the final layout.

When will you get to see the final Naughty Paris Guide? Stay tuned...a small number of copies will be available by the holidays, before the official launch in January 2008.

Bisous, and good night!
Heather signing off....

After a few days' break, the photographer returns from the French Riviera for two final days of Naughty Paris shooting in Paris. I was able to get a few more appointments settled, but we have a lot to cover in a short time.

On Monday morning we begin at Le Bon Marché department store, shooting images of the Théâtre de Beauté (that's a fancy name for the Cosmetics and Perfume Department). If you just walk into a department store (well, most stores, actually) and start shotting photos, you'll have a very angry staff on your back very quickly. At the Bon Marché we had to get special badges AND a letter from the PR director giving us permission to take photos. We had to whip out the letter several times, and even with it the woman at the Chanel counter was being officious and making a lot of phone calls to find out whether it was really okay for us to have our model photographed in front of a huge bottle of Chanel n°5. Since I didn't think we had time to sit around and wait, we just left and found another stand that wouldn't hassle us.

The people at Guerlaine were very polite, and the makeup artist Sebastien even agreed to do a little impromptu make-over on our model for the camera.

Nicole's Mona Lisa smile.

After the Bon Marché we broke for lunch. But we don't ever really get breaks. Kirsten continued shooting photos as we walked to the café in the Jardins du Luxembourg. I had to keep an eye out for the park guards (professional shooting in the Paris parks requires a permit, so anyone with a tripod or even a fancy-looking camera will get stopped). Luckily the guards seem to be on vacation already, and we have no problems. The sun is a bit too strong, creating contrasts that don't photograph well. Who knew that the pros actually prefer overcast days?

We meet up with writer Stephen Clarke (author of the best-selling Year in the Merde series) at lunch. I know Kirsten is a huge fan, so I ask him if he'll do a cameo appearance in the book for us (see Day 9).

Stephen checking out Kirsten's camera.

We're running a little late (slow waiter), so being the cruel boss lady that I am, I herd Kirsten to the next appointment before her noisette café arrives. We have a rendez-vous with Victoria Vesta, the Pleasure Coach. My friends are all quite intrigued by the idea of a Pleasure Coach. Even after visiting Victoria's website, Divine Feminine Touch, they are still full of questions. "So what exactly does she do?" being the most common. She teaches men, women, and couples how to touch each other. She does sensual massage to help people learn about their own erogenous zones. She talks to people, helping them find their own sensuality and remove whatever might be blocking that in their lives....et cetera. No, there's no sex. She's not that kind of masseuse.

The Boudoir.

So, that out the way, back to the shoot. The room where the sessions take place is very dark, so Kirsten gets to work setting up the tripod and testing different angles and lighting. I check out the cool feathers (used in the massage), but start getting worried about our female model, who seems to be MIA. We begin with the male model on the table, and I end up standing in as a hand model (this isn't the only time you'll see my hands in the book), with Victoria showing me how to massage the model. There's a bit of a debate about whether the model's bare bottom should be seen in the guide or not. After all, this is a lady's guide, and even if it's implied, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with showing it. We compromise with a strategically-placed feather and everyone is happy (good thing the model isn't ticklish).

The model's legs and Victoria's hand.

Our female model hasn't been answering her phone because she forgot it at home and had been standing outside the metro station hoping I'd come find her (she didn't have the address with her either). That finally cleared up, we take the rest of the photos and then head back out to take some shopping photos around Place St-Sulpice.



Our model's in a playful mood as always (which is sooooooo helpful, since Kirsten and I need the energy boost at this point), and hops onto a red Vespa parked in the square. I pray that it doesn't tip over, or that the owner isn't sitting on the café terrace across the street glaring at us. It is a cute Vespa, and I wish we could have her riding around on one with her shopping bags. Alas, as cute as it may be, how many people visiting Paris rent a scooter? Hmmmm....maybe more SHOULD.



We say good bye to our model Nicole and head home for a short break before meeting two other models for more shopping pics on the Avenue Montaigne. We get there at about 8:30pm so we have good light (and minimum foot traffic from shoppers). I window shop while Kirsten directs the models (basically, walking back and forth a million times until the shot looks "natural"). I continuously herd the bystanders out of the camera's range, and carry around Kirsten's tripod like a caddy (we decide that we'll hire a caddy for the next guidebook. And a personal masseuse).

Kirsten shows the models how to walk while I guard the camera.

The sun is almost down, but the day is not over. One of the restaurants in the guide, Ginger, is right around the corner, and we need some night shots of the dining room. The models are starving, so we kill two birds with one stone. Ginger is surprisingly full for a Monday night on July 30, so we decide to start at the bar where we won't disturb anyone. We ask the barman Sophana to mix us some pretty cocktails (pretty strong, that is) for the models, while Kirsten and I continue on our Perrier diets.

Kirsten goes over the day's shoot with the models.

Pho at Ginger...must feed the models...

By the time enough clients have left to get shots of the dining room, it's almost midnight. We celebrate with a nightcap (wine for me, Champagne for Kirsten, who says that bars in Toronto don't serve it by the glass like they do in Paris). I put her in a taxi soon after. She calls ten minutes later to tell me she has seen the perfect spot to shoot the foot of the Eiffel Tower. I ask her how, between the Champs-Elysées and the Latin Quarter, she ended up passing the foot of the Eiffel Tower. She barely speaks French, so I think her taxi driver was giving her the "tourist tour" of the city. Sigh. I ask her to make sure she gets a receipt.

Tomorrow is our last day of shooting. I can barely sleep, hoping that we're not forgetting anything important.

Come back tomorrow to see a sneak peek inside the only fetish club left in Paris!

I'm not sure where our energy is coming from. Sheer willpower at this point! I pull up in front of the photographer's hotel at 5:55am. I had promised her and the model that I'd bring some pain au chocolat, but the local bakery still isn't open.

The model is waiting for us on the Quai Voltaire, and we drive as fast as possible through morning traffic to get to the foot of the Eiffel Tower before the sun comes up. I try and remind myself that we won't get there any faster if I get us run over by the big Shell truck on our tail.

The Champ de Mars is filthy in the morning, littered with garbage, overflowing plastic trash bags, and crows picking through it. The model is a trooper, though, and walks around barefoot after we check for bottle caps and broken glass. Kirsten figures she can Photoshop the trash out if it gets in the picture, but luckily during the course of the half-hour shoot, the municipal workers manage to get it all cleaned up (they actually walk around and clean it up on foot with their claw tools).



After getting the picture we want, we head over to the nearest bakery that's open and sit down for some breakfast. I drop off the model back at her place and then Kirsten at Orly airport. She'll be down on the Côte d'Azur for a few days shooting for own private portfolio (the South of France has an amazing quality of light that you don't get anywhere else in France).



I go back home and sleep for the rest of the day. The photographer will only be back for three days before returning to Toronto, so I need to make sure all of the last-minute appointments are settled and that we have the models on board. There are a few places that we haven't received permission to shoot yet, so I have to get a bit more aggressive....or get creative!

Check back on August 3 for Day 8!!